Your baby cries at the breast, comes off halfway through, always prefers the same side, or falls asleep after a few minutes. Or they feed for a long time and your nipples end up sore and damaged. You’ve been told it’s “just a matter of positioning”, but you’ve tried everything and it’s still hard.
First of all: when latching doesn’t go well, it isn’t your fault, and it isn’t your baby’s. Breastfeeding is natural, but it isn’t automatic. It involves two bodies learning to fit together, and sometimes there is something in the way that is worth looking at more calmly.
Breastfeeding is teamwork
To feed well, a baby has to open their mouth wide, place their tongue under the nipple, seal with their lips, and coordinate sucking, swallowing and breathing. All at once, with their neck and trunk in a position that lets them feel comfortable.
On the mother’s side, what matters is her body position, the shape of the breast and nipple, pain or tiredness after the birth, and the confidence she gains with each feed.
When one of these pieces doesn’t fit, latching becomes harder. That’s why we look at both of you: mother and baby.
What may lie at the root
There are many possible reasons for latching difficulties, and several can exist at once. Some of the ones we see often:
Tension from the birth
Birth is an intense physical experience for the baby too. A long or very fast labour, a difficult position in the womb or birth canal, a ventouse or forceps delivery, or a caesarean can leave a baby with areas of increased tension, for example in the head, neck or jaw. This can show up as a preference for one side, difficulty turning the head, or discomfort in certain positions.
Jaw, tongue and neck mobility
To feed, a baby needs to open their mouth wide and move their tongue freely. If the jaw opens only a little, the tongue has limited movement, or the neck is stiffer on one side, sucking may be less effective. The baby tires, comes off the breast or grips harder with their lips, and the mother feels pain.
Assessing the tongue frenulum (tongue-tie) is done by professionals with specific training, together with the paediatrician. Our role is to look at overall mobility and work on the surrounding tension, not to replace that assessment.
Posture of mother and baby
Mothers often feed hunched over, with tense shoulders and the baby held away from the body, because of back pain, an uncomfortable scar or simple exhaustion. The baby, in turn, may have their head turned away from their body, which makes swallowing harder. Small adjustments in support and alignment make a difference for both.
The mother’s pain and recovery
A sensitive caesarean scar, perineal pain, tension in the neck and shoulders, or already damaged nipples make every feed harder. Caring for the mother is also caring for breastfeeding.
How we work
The first appointment starts with a conversation: how the pregnancy and birth went, how feeds are going, what you feel, what your baby does. If possible, we watch a feed, calmly and without rushing.
For the baby, paediatric osteopathy uses very gentle touch to assess and work with the mobility of the head, neck, jaw and trunk. Many parents tell us their baby seems more comfortable and that feeds become easier, but every baby responds in their own way and we don’t promise results.
For the mother, we can work on posture, tension in the shoulders and neck, a caesarean scar or the pelvic floor, and find more comfortable feeding positions.
We don’t work alone. What we do complements the care of:
- midwives and specialist nurses, who support mother and baby in the first days and weeks;
- breastfeeding counsellors and lactation consultants, who assess the latch, milk transfer and how feeding is managed;
- the paediatrician or GP, who monitors your baby’s growth and health and makes any diagnoses needed.
Whenever it makes sense, we encourage families to seek out or continue with this support.
What you can try now
- Bring your baby to you, not the breast to your baby. Tummy to tummy, with ear, shoulder and hip in line.
- Support yourself well: back supported, feet resting, cushions taking your baby’s weight. Your shoulders should be able to drop.
- Try different positions, such as laid-back feeding (you semi-reclined, your baby lying tummy-down on you), which helps many babies find the breast by themselves.
- Skin-to-skin outside feeds also helps your baby settle and find their way.
When to seek help
Look for support (a midwife, lactation consultant, physiotherapist or osteopath) if:
- feeds are always painful or your nipples are damaged;
- your baby always prefers the same side or finds it hard to turn their head;
- your baby comes off often, makes clicking sounds or seems to tire very quickly;
- every feed feels like a struggle.
Speak to your paediatrician or seek urgent medical care if your baby refuses to feed, is very sleepy, floppy or hard to wake, has a fever, has few wet nappies, isn’t gaining weight or is losing weight, has yellowish skin or eyes that aren’t improving, or vomits frequently. For yourself, see a doctor if you have a fever, a red, hot and painful area on the breast, or feel generally unwell.
A path you walk together
Latching difficulties don’t mean you can’t breastfeed. They mean it’s worth looking more closely at what your body and your baby’s body are communicating.
If you’d like to talk about your situation, send us a message on WhatsApp. We’ll reply calmly and, if it makes sense, book an appointment for you, for your baby, or for both of you.